by Curt Kovener
A homonym, as Mrs. Lewis’ CHS English students had better recall, (if they are still alive and dementia hasn’t set in) is a word that sounds like another or perhaps is spelled the same as another but has a different meaning.
And homonyms are one of the reasons English is so difficult to learn. That and when to use Lie, Lay Laid, Lain.
Their and there, for and fore, meet and meat, hear and here are homonyms however, for our readers with roots south of the river (both Ohio and Muscatatuck) far and fire are not homonyms.
As example, in this week’s court news we report on some who a charged with reckless driving— an arrestable offense— but wreckless driving is something for which we should all strive.
Some of the more confusing aspects of the Southern Hoosier brand of English we use to communicate is when two words are spelled the same but pronounced differently.
Take these homonymic examples for instance:
•We must polish the Polish furniture.
•He could lead if he would get the lead out.
•The farm was used to produce produce.
•The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
•The soldier decided to desert in the desert. But rarely do people desert before eating dessert.
•This was a good time to present the present.
•A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
•When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
•I did not object to the object, for I was being objective.
•The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
•The bandage was wound around the wound.
•There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
•They were too close to the door to close it.
•The buck does funny things when the does are present.
•They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.
•To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
•The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
•After a number of injections my jaw got number.
•Upon seeing the tear in my clothes I shed a tear.
•How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
•The big brown bat flew off the wooden baseball bat.
•There was some mint growing outside the US mint.
•I had to subject the subject to a series of tests on various subjects.
And it was usually the subject of English where Mrs. Lewis’ students subjected themselves to her knowledge as well as subject to frustration trying to comprehend such a confusing subject. But while I learned these in the previous millennium it is still a 21st century grammar lesson for us all.