Some Of Life’s Confounding Questions

by Curt Kovener

Now that I am a member of the gray hair and Medicare Club, I have been around long enough to compile some perplexing and confounding questions on the world in which we live.
I’m not talking about ‘What’s the meaning of life?’ or ‘Does the Universe have an end? And if it doesn’t, Why?’ or ‘Why are all areas of government from federal to Indiana to Jackson County controlled by the GOP and still we can’t all get along?’
No, I am talking about the important stuff of life like…
•Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
•If a word is misspelled in a dictionary, how would we ever know?
•If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
•Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? And how do we get back in to whack?
•Why do ‘tug’ boats push their barges?
•Why do they sing ‘Take me out to the ball game’, when they are already there?
•Why are they called ‘stands’ when they’re made for sitting?
•Why is it called ‘after dark’, when it is really after light?
•Doesn’t ‘expecting the unexpected’ make the unexpected expected?
•Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
•Why is phonics not spelled the way it sounds?
•If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
•If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
•Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
•Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
•Why is bra singular and panties plural?